Valentine's Day Gifts
Strip Tease Stripper Pole
We’ve all fantasized about either being a stripper or taking one home. Or hey, maybe both. Realize you and your man’s fantasies a by getting this Strip Tease Stripper Pole. Installation is easy as it comes with an installation DVD for the handy inept. This sturdy stripper pole is great for static or spinning tricks creating the ultimate strip tease whether your a beginner or an expert. As an exercise accessory it allows for a fun and exciting way to tone and gain strength. As erotic play in the bedroom it allows for fun and exciting ways to get down and dirty. This is a win-win situation here people!$129.99*All Products - Gifts for Women - Sexy Gifts - Valentine's Day Gifts for Her - Valentine's Day Gifts for Him - BUY IT!
Sex Panther Pheromone Cologne
Rawr! Look at you, sex panther. Your manly manliness it’s just too overwhelming. This, manly sex panther man, is the scent of masculinity and animalistic natural instincts that elicit passionate outbursts out of any woman who happens to wander into your vicinity.WARNING: PRODUCT MAY ONLY BE WORN BY MEN AMONG MEN WHO ARE MORE RAGING BEASTLY PANTHERS THAN MEN. If anyone without the level of manliness required to wear sex panther cologne tries to wear this, the intensity of it will immediately make them roll into a fetal position, suck their thumb and cal lfor mommy to come save them.$34.00*All Products - Gifts for Men - Men’s Accessories - Sexy Gifts - Valentine's Day Gifts for Him - BUY IT!
Dead Cupid Smartphone Case
Cupid’s history of consistently f*cking up lives makes him the most notorious emotional terrorist in existence. He hopes to strike again this February 14. Your mission: kill him. If this is your mission, this smartphone case will truly express your feelings for that flabby flying baby who enjoys screwing up everyone’s life.$14.99
Grumpy Cat Valentine’s Plush
Not a fan of Valentine’s Day? Neither is Grumpy Cat. She’s here to express her absolute loathing for the holiday of love. She bears gifts, a heart with her favorite word ever: NO. This is what her answer is to about 90% of everything, actually. A perfect gift for the regular Valentine’s Day hater or grinch.$7.49*All Products - Eff Valentine's Day! - Gifts for Kids - Gifts for Women - Valentine's Day Gifts for Her - BUY IT!
Rose Pattern Paint Roller
Ordinary roses die. Give your girl not just a dozen, perishable flowers but a room full of long lasting, beautiful roses- on the wall! This empaistic flower pattern paint roller is a handy and innovative way of creating patterns on the wall without having to look to hard to handle decals and wall stickers. No need to plaster wallpaper up either.$10.99
If your home is need of some revamping, try the rustic boho look. This beautiful geo diamond shaped terrarium is a perfect way to start your terrarium collection. Looks great virtually anywhere and can be used for almost any type of home dcor.$79.95
Cat is my Valentine Tshirt
All you need in this live of sin is you and your cat friend, you and your cat friend. Own it with this “My cat is my valentine” shirt and sh*t on everyone who’s hugged up and being nauseatingly sappy.$13.99*All Products - Eff Valentine's Day! - Funny & Gag - Gifts for Men - Valentine's Day Gifts for Him - BUY IT!
Rude Heart Candy Decals
If you’re making a statement about how much you hate Vday, you’ll need to put a spin on the classic look of Vday with a really rude, sarcastic twist. These Valentine’s-y colored decals look like they’re in the spirit but once you read what each heart has to say, you realize they’re definitely NOT.$5.04
Cat is my Valentine T-Shirt (Her)
Face it, you’re a alone on Valentine’s Day which means you’re doomed to live the life of a crazy cat lady/spinster. F*ck it, own that sh*t! Rock your life status proudly as you walk amongst all these hand-holding, lip-locking, googly-eyed, Notebook-watching lovebirds that make you want to vomit. Who needs romance anyway when you have your tride and true feline friend who’s got your back! Granted, he literally has your back because his claws are dug into that cashmere sweater, but yeah- he’s got it!$19.99*All Products - Eff Valentine's Day! - Funny & Gag - Gifts for Women - Valentine's Day Gifts for Her - BUY IT!
Vday Lollipop Condom
Give your lover something sweet for Valentine’s Day-how bout a nice condom pop for starters? It gives them a nice little preview of just what they’e in for for the night and still looks great amongst other nicely packages Vday gifts.$5.95
Honey Badger Talking Plush
Forget a boring teddy bear for Valentine’s Day. You think Teddy gives a sh*t about your undying love for your girl/boyfriend? Well he doesn’t and he doesn’t do much more than sit there and collect dust. If you’re going to gift your honey with a plush anima that couldn’t care less about your relationship, might as well be a honey badger that makes you laugh with his rude remarks. The world’s most fearless animal, this guy aint never scared! He has a variety of things to say to you that will leave you offended but tres amused.$41.55
Bittersweet Dipping Chocolate
Vday is always a bittersweet event. You hate Valentines Day but you love chocolate. On this nauseating day of pink everything and cutesy, lovey dovey, sappy BS, there will be quite enough sweetness flying around everywhere. At your anti-valentine’s day party, satisfy the demand for chocolate with this appropriately bittersweet chocolate dip so you can enjoy the perks of the stupid holiday without having to indulge in the cliche.$24.80